Annoyance April Form Saves


Annoyance April: Web browser forms saving your inputs.

I get that this is supposed to be a “feature” and that you can turn it off, but the fact that it happens by default bugs the living hell out of me.  It’s the epitome of anti-security.

It doesn’t save passwords, sure.  But if I want to go to someone’s computer and type in a few words in their URL bar, I bet I can figure out what bank you bank with.  And then on the login screen, if I just try hitting letters A-Z… well, there’s the login you use.  That’s my start to start trying to figure out the associated password, or if nothing else, I can probably use it to begin a social engineering attack with the tech support people at your bank.

I never save browser form information, and you shouldn’t either.  Do yourself a favor.

Annoyance April LED Lightbulbs


Annoyance April: LED Lightbulbs

I HATE those frigging LED lightbulbs.  I know they’re trying to phase out standard bulbs, because I guess they’re made of pure satanic evil, but at least leave me the OPTION.  I do not want to be stuck with those terrible LED bulbs as my sole option.

The light they emit is just cold and harsh in a way that is hard to describe.  It’s like it’s TOO bright.  You can always tell LED christmas lights, because they glow with this strange color that just looks odd and a tad too vibrant to your eye.  Well, the actual bulbs made to go in your home are worse.

I’ve read a ton of different studies showing that staring at that kind of light is bad for several different reasons, but honestly?  I just hate it.  I like good ol’ warm-light bulbs.  It’s way closer to the look of natural sunlight than those nightmarish LEDs.

I hope you, my loyal army of readers, will join me in boycotting LED bulbs.  And even if you don’t, I’d seriously appreciate you breaking as many as you can next time you’re at Walmart.  They’ll throw you out, sure, but the chances of a serious arrest are pretty unlikely.  And even so, isn’t it worth it?

Annoyance April Bottled Water


Annoyance April: Bottled Water.

Yeah, that’s right, bottled water.  It’s not bottled water itself, actually.  It’s what it represents.  The fucking government allows so many chemicals to be put into tap water that I generally won’t drink it.

In my home, I have an extremely high grade filter to filter the tap water.  It’s ridiculous to the point that you can taste a glass of straight tap water and a taste of the post-filter water, and it’s not even a question as to which is which.

I buy bottled waters here and there when I have to, but I hate that you feel forced into it because you don’t want to put the freely available water into your body.

Annoyance April Drake


Annoyance April: Drake.

Sorry, Drake.  I actually think you make fairly catchy songs, and that you’re an intelligent guy with a good sense of humor about yourself.

That said, your guest spot in Work with Rihanna is the absolute worst part of that song, and I’m literally working right now on using Audacity to cut the song down and edit you out.  Your bridge section is utter shit, and it annoys the hell out of me.

I’d even love to post the edit when it’s done, because I’m sure I’m not the only one who thinks you stink up a section of an otherwise great tune.  I can’t though.  Since millions of people read each day, I don’t feel comfortable posting a copyrighted song.  Pretty sure Rihanna is a loyal reader though, so if you’re reading this, please contact me if you would be cool with me posting my own edit of Work.

Annoyance April Phone Check


Annoyance April: Checking your phone all the time during conversation.

This may possibly be the thing I hate most in our modern society.  I have come to absolutely HATE when someone checks their phone while we’re having a conversation.  It drives me fucking insane.  If I ask you to look something up?  Sure.  Are we waiting for a friend to text us to meet up?  No problem.  Heroin dealer calling soon so we can all shoot up?  Then fine!  But if we’re just in the middle of a conversation, and you’re checking your phone – even if someone texts you – that is fucking annoying.  And, honestly, it’s rude.

I’ve started calling people out on it all the time now.  It instantly infuriates me.  Oh, I’m sorry, is our conversation so uninteresting that you need to respond to that stupid fucking meaningless text someone just sent you?  Unless you’re waiting to hear that your mom made it out of surgery, then just fucking wait until later.  If you’re more concerned about your phone than hanging out with people in real life, then maybe you should go hang out with your phone, freeing me up to hang with people who are interested in actually interacting.

Smartphones are extremely useful tools.  No denying it.  But it doesn’t mean that you should be looking at the fucking thing constantly.  I make it a massive point nowadays to NEVER look at it – honestly, I’ve seriously come to hate my phone for the most part, outside of the ability to play Hearthstone on it.  When people hear it vibrate in my pocket and ask do you need to check that I always say nope, absolutely not, I couldn’t care less about whatever was just texted to me.  If someone really needs me, they’ll call – no one ever calls unless something is actually important/urgent.  Otherwise, fuck the phone.  I’m with the person I want to be with right now.

Lately, my gal and I have even taken to ditching our phones when we go out together.  We’ll throw them in a coat or backpack and check it at the event, so we can just spend time together and not be bothered.  It’s delightful.  I recommend everyone do it.

I have another friend who has a new rule with his buddies: when they go out together, everyone puts their phone face down in a pile in the middle of the table.  If anyone checks their phone, they pick up the entire tab.

So yeah.  Fuck phones, and if you’re one of the people who is constantly checking it, maybe consider how that comes off to the other person.  It’s rude, and it says you’re not as interesting as looking at this stupid dog picture someone just sent me.  Consider looking at your stupid phone less, and enjoying the time spent with real people more.  If one of your good friends died tomorrow, I bet you’d be wishing you’d spent more time speaking them.  I doubt you’d say man, I’m glad I spent half of our conversations looking at my iphone!